Every week I attend a local networking event and I meet lots of business people from my town and other nearby cities. Just before leaving the event, I came across a friendly man, looked like he was in his 60s, nice smile. So I sat and chatted with him for a few minutes. I’ll call him Dave.
“Dave” had all sorts of tips and hints at success for me, right there in that little conversation. He had lots to say, and I became curious, so I agreed to meet him on the following Monday.
In the meantime, I did a quick internet search for him. His name came up only once, and it is for the company he works for, as a mortgage broker. Dave had been in real estate his whole working career, he told me. He never gave me his business card. OK, so this guy’s a complete enigma.
So the meeting wasn’t a complete disaster. He did have some good and constructive advice, particularly with financial planning. I have to admit that before joining this networking group, I never gave much thought to planning what to do with the money that came into our lives besides buying the things we need to survive. Well, each dollar needs to be planned for.
Even though I’d like a newer car, it is not just going to happen once enough money is saved. I have to allocate money for the car, specifically. Or vacation money, specifically. Otherwise it’s hit or miss if you achieve getting what you want.
As a result of “Dave’s” suggestion, I went home and looked up exactly how much we have between my husband and myself, and set up some automatic savings accounts. I also found a few ways to stop spending money unnecessarily.
This man is a big believer in language and how the things you say manifest into your reality. I absolutely agree and it prompted me to get out my book again called Conscious Language: The Logos of Now, by Robert Tennyson Stevens. He pointed out to me when I’d say “I need to” or “I should,” big no-no’s in conscious language. If I weren’t into using conscious language, I’d have found it annoying. I almost wrote that I need to revisit the message in this book, but that would be hilarious, because “I need” is “without” it is a language of lack. I WILL revisit the message in this book. There, that’s better.
So “Dave” proceeded to go on about artists. Now remember, we know nothing about each other! I believe he has good intentions, but I assume he would like to see me succeed by his definition of success. He said things like I’m living in the financial fringes of society and will likely be broke by the time I’m 67. His favorite phrase was most people by the time they are 67 are dead or dead broke. Ha ha ha (insert sarcasm).
He gave examples of how he and his wife would trade off – when he’d start a new business, she would have a “steady job”. Then he was blatantly implying that I should just get up and get a job. A receptionist at Kaiser hospital was a suggestion. Thank you, sir.
But I listened to what he had to say, for I am a good and attentive listener. Yes, a lot of what he said makes sense. Creative people tend to live riskier lives. The chance we take is SOOO worth it. Make a thriving living as an artist. It can happen. But I was in a different state of mind during this conversation. He subtly talked me into getting some sort of part-time job if I don’t reach a goal I have by this June.
Support all around me
By the time I got home, I was feeling devastated! The prospect of doing anything else with my life was something I never had considered. And here I was, after having an hour and a half conversation with a complete stranger, considering doing just that! And it was only because PART of the argument made sense.
But my dear and wonderful husband talked me through it, calming and soothing my edgy nerves. I’m so grateful he’s supportive of my dreams and goals to be a successful artist. I know I will face taking some actions that are uncomfortable, but we all have to do uncomfortable things to get ahead. He believes in me!
I also took to a private FaceBook mastermind group I belong to, and the person who leads this group responded to my story saying this guy was so full of crap. He personally knows a couple dozen artists regularly making a very good living and many of them are making money in the six figures. Another person in the group said that when you put yourself out there, you will consistently get the attitude that I would be a starving artist. That is the prevailing assumption in this culture right now.
Yes, “Dave” is not in my industry. He doesn’t know what is possible today. So now what do I do? I let it go. I share this post because it was a valuable learning experience, but now it’s done and time to move forward. Now I know what to expect from naysayers.
Have you had an experience like this before? Share your story in the comments.
Creative Commons image by Joe St. Pierre. Some rights reserved.